I am a Mormon, but I support Gay Rights. There are many, many, reasons why I do. In many other States/faiths this would be a popular stance, but if you're a Mormon it's social suicide.
I want to just put some thoughts here, on this historic day. Feel free to judge me as being a bad Mormon/Christian. I'm cool with it.
Winston Churchill once said,
“You can always count on the Americans to do the right thing --after they have tried everything else.”
Today the US Supreme Court made the decision to make Gay Marriage legal in all 50 States. Finally. It took us waaay too long, but we eventually got around to it. I want my children to know my feelings on this topic (I'm assuming they'll read this blog after I die, while shedding a single tear because they miss me so much and then their new Mom will make them cookies and they'll remember how much cooler she is than I ever was with my low-sugar agenda. I digress.).
If you are a Mormon, you will undoubtedly hear some phrase at some point about how this church had to be restored in America because of this Country's religious freedoms. I agree. Every day of my life I have been permitted to practice my faith in the way that I choose. And I afford everyone else that same right. This also means that I feel it is morally wrong to use my vote to deny others' rights based on my religious beliefs. And that includes denying marriage to homosexuals. I'm convinced that the ONLY objection people have to gay marriage is based on religion.
If we use our own religious logic to deny them that right, "It's in the Bible! It's wrong!" then others could so easily use that against us as well. Mormon marriages within LDS Temples are recognized by the government in the United States. In many other countries around the world they are not. One must be married civilly first.
Despite many other "sins" in the bible we commit every day we can still be married. I got to get married even though I cut my hair (a sin according to the bible), wear jewelry (a sin according to the bible), eat bacon (a sin according to the bible....delicious, delicious, sin), etc.
I believe that faith is a very personal thing. I believe that one's choice to be in an organized religion is also very personal. I choose my religion because it is a means by which I choose to worship God and Jesus Christ. The end. It's for me and my family. I believe it is morally wrong to use religion for any other facet of life. And I would feel like a hypocrite if I used my belief in God to dictate other people's choices (when they do not negatively affect others).
Love is love. In a world where more than 50% of heterosexual marriages end in divorce, let love bloom where it may. Let commitment be present between any two consenting adults. Let families be made with two parents (no matter their gender), not just one, as is so often the case in today's rampant divorce climate. Let God judge the hearts and actions and "sins" of our fellowman. Let the great commandments to Love God and Love Thy Neighbor trump our personal political agendas. Let us decide what our own hearts tells us is right, not just what our religious leaders tell us is right. Let us use the Bible ONLY as a means of helping ourselves grow and love and serve others as Jesus taught. Let us never be found using the bible to tell others how to live and love and worship God. Let the Bible work to change YOUR heart, and for no other purpose.
For years the LDS church denied religious rights to black men. By the church's own official declaration (a pretty fascinating read, by the way) there seems to be no God-declared reason for doing so. Eventually, we got it together. I hope that this topic has a similar fate within the LDS faith. Let ALL Americans engage in America's promise to the right of the Pursuit of Happiness. Maybe that right allows you to practice Mormonism. Maybe it allows you to marry someone you love and are committed to. Maybe that someone is your same gender. It's still your right.
Kids of mine, I hope by the time I'm dead and you read this, the notion of denying gay-marriage seems as foreign and misguided a concept as segregated schools and Whites Only water-fountains seem to us now.
As a parting thought may I share with you one of the tenets of the LDS faith, "We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may."
Yes, you can say I am a "Liberal Mormon" or even a "Crappy Mormon", but do you know what is far more important to me than being a good Mormon? Being a good person. I use my faith as a way to become a better person, but it is not the only reason I am a good person. I claim for myself the right to live according to the dictates of MY own conscience and I allow all men the same privilege.
15 comments
BRAVO! Well said, and congratulations to the USA on this historic decision. We in Canada salute you. I agree with you completely, and as a non-Mormon Christian, who are any of us to judge each other? Love is Love, and always has been!
I also believe in standing up for what I think but I don't a have a blog. ;) I think to be happy about this shows a complete lack of understanding of the purpose of marriage. This past week I renewed my temple recommend and one of the questions threw me a little off guard. He said "Do you affiliate or agree with any group or individual whose teachings or practices are contrary to or oppose those accepted by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, or do you sympathize with the precepts of any such group or individual?" I've been through that interview enough to know that the "agree with" part is new. It seems to me the line In the sand is being drawn. Your opinion might be unpopular among Mormons but it's certainly not in the world. It's going to take courage and conviction in these days to truly stand up for what's right. (By the way I have zero problem with gay rights. I believe we are all god's children and deserve respect and love. Marriage is not a right it's a God ordained ritual to bring children into the world)
Interesting thoughts, Emilie. Thank you.
When I think of the hate, shame and bullying that my gay relatives and friends have endured for being gay, or "acting gay" or "sounding gay," I can't help but be happy for them on this day. (Here I invoke the memory of Matthew Shepard.)
As for you being a Liberal Mormon or even a Crappy Mormon--recently at our Stake Conference the visiting General Authority told the audience that if he had to do it all over again when his children were young, he'd worry less about having a church-centered home and focus more on having a Christ-centered home. I thought those were bold words from a General Authority, and I think that's the point you're trying to get across in your last paragraph.
Finally, I like this part of your post best: Let God judge the hearts and actions and "sins" of our fellowman.
When it comes to this issue, that's where my testimony leads me, too.
You go girl!
Ellen, i have been very open about my feelings on this in recent Temple Recommend interviews. No one has denyed my a recommend yet. Just like i disagree with the line drawn in the sand in the past by church leaders concerning blacks and the Priesthood, i also disagree with this line in the sand. There's no doubt (or misunderstanding on my part) on the church's stance on this. I just dont agree with it. Brigham Young said that if black and white people ever married eachother they would go straight to hell. I disagree. He also condoned keeping black slaves (in the footnotes of the church's essay cited above). I disagree.
Also, marriage is a religious institution (made by God), bit it's ALSO a social and secular one. And its definately NOT just for the making of babies. Many infertile and aged couples would agree. This issue is about social and secular recognition, but prople of faith seem to think it's only about faith. I dont believe that Jesus Christ maxe this chirch and restored it for the purpose of imposing our biblical beliefs on others unless their sin punishes others (murder, stealing, etc).
Like I mentioned in my comment on your last controversial subject, there's no point in arguing because I'll never change your mind and you'll certainly never change mine. Just expressing my opinion and standing up for what I believe is eternal truth. I firmly believe as this plays out there WILL be a line in the sand and I will make no question about whose side I'm on. Ridicule or not.
Ellen, you won't know until you get there! Maybe starting your own blog is a great idea.
Well said!
I'm curious about as to what, specifically, you disagree with the church on in relation to gay marriage? The church's position has recently evolved toward tolerance and respect for others, while defending the doctrines that underly the plan of salvation and temple marriage for the church and its members.
The church's recent support of anti-discrimination legislation in Utah underscores this meaningful shift in rhetoric and policy. From the statement made after the decision this morning: "While showing respect for those who think differently, the Church will continue to teach and promote marriage between a man and a woman as a central part of our doctrine and practice."
The overall position of the church is, in a nutshell, that the law is that law and we respect and will uphold it, and show respect for those that hold other beliefs, but that it doesn't change the doctrine of the church or its teachings on marriage.
What's there to disagree with in that? Is it your belief that ultimately the church needs to change its doctrine and embrace gay marriage in its own teachings and temple practices?
I don't understand same-sex attraction as I have not struggled with this in my life.
Based on my life experiences and faith it comes down to an oversimplified fact for me- it takes what a man has and what a woman has in order to have biological children- in order to continue the human race. Therefore that is what marriage is meant to be. We have a heavenly father and a heavenly mother.
I respect those who live their life differently from me and I know that God wants each of us to live a happy and giving life. I also share what my beliefs are (although that is becoming increasingly difficult as it is seen as such an unpopular and intolerable view) and expect others to respect the choices I have made in my life.
This was so well reasoned and so well written. You make it seem so logical. And I completely understand where you're coming from.
But.
But you believe in modern prophets. You believe that they receive revelation from God. I know men are fallible but there is no question in this situation: if you believe in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we know the answer. And the answer is: "We...solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children." So...does it matter if you disagree? When nations turn from God, they are destroyed. DESTROYED! The Nephites! Sodom & Gomorrah! We know what happens, and it's happening all over again, and the people who know are cheering it on! I am completely baffled at the response to this ruling.
There is no constitutional basis for the Supreme Court's decision. And by allowing this, they will actually infringe on my right to exercise my religion as I see fit, which is actually defined in the constitutional amendments. I am so sad about this. Of course I will allow you to exercise your religion according to the dictates of your own conscious. But I hope you'll allow me to feel sad about it. :/
i could go on and on, but what i will say i good for you, for standing by what you believe in even though it isn't "popular". i think regardless of religion people need to be open minded and know that change will happen. and change is good.
I wish you had included your point above in the blog. "Marriage" is an overloaded word. It's what occurs in the temple or church ceremony. It is also what happens when you go to a justice of the peace. No one is or will force churches to marry people they don't agree with. The mormon church will not have to marry gay couples; they are protected by religious freedom.
But that same religious freedom should protect people whose religion does allow gay marriage. So it should be legal in society, and each religion can decide for themselves whether to allow it within their own framework.
This is more directed towards Emily and Ellen. I thought these words from the Archbishop of Santa Fe in today's Albuquerque Journal articulated both of the points Emily and Ellen made in their comments. And though I do not agree with them, I am saying it's worth considering what others have to say:
"As Catholics, we seek to uphold our traditional belief in marriage as a sacrament, a well established and divinely revealed covenant between one man and one woman, a permanent and exclusive bond meant to provide a nurturing environment for children and the fundamental building block to a just society.
...Although we respectfully disagree with those who would define marriage otherwise, we firmly hold that all persons are loved by our compassionate God and deserve the respect and dignity that is inherently theirs as human beings.
...At the same time, we urge our lawmakers and judges to respect those institutions that are beyond state and federal jurisdiction, institutions such as sacramental marriage that transcend civil law and whose origins precede the existence of the state and go beyond its competence."
I thought of adding some summary (maybe defensive) thought to that, but I think I'll let this stand alone.
very interesting reading the comments to your post Emilie - thanks so much for addressing this topic!
I am shaking my head at the notion that people are concerned about the potential "sinning" of so many others ... if we truly are loving and accepting of others (as we are all taught regardless of religious doctrine), then it isn't my business how the next person choses to live their life provided they are not harming others ...
isn't my relationship with the utmost eternal higher power between me and God? I get to chose how I live my life (God Bless America!) and I'll teach my children to love others regardless of how they chose to live their lives (provided we aren't harming one another) as we are all children of God
hopefully having discussion on this topic will help us all to learn to respect each other more
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