A sad day.

The nurse came and told us this morning that Ella had to be admitted to the Newborn Intensive Care Unit. In the night her blood/sugar level dropped as did her temperature. We visited her this afternoon and it was really hard to see her laying in just a little diaper with an oxygen tube in her nose, an IV in her tiny little hand and electrodes all over her body to monitor her. The nurses said she is doing well but will have to stay for a while. This means we were not able to take her home with us. This possibility had never occurred to me. 

We went to visit her in the NICU at 10:00pm and she no longer needed the heat lamp or her oxygen tubes. This is good progress. Up until this point the nurses could not get her to eat, and now she is taking a bottle of formula. We can come and visit her every three hours and feed her the bottle and visit with her for 1/2 hour. She is always asleep since her little body has to work extra hard to do what is normal. We don't get to see her pretty blue eyes often, but I am so happy that things are getting a bit better.

After our visit we said goodbye and then came home to an empty house with no baby. I tried to be brave like she has been, but I cried and cried. I thought when I had this baby that if I had any questions or problems I could just call someone in my family, but this has never happened before. There is no one who could understand how alone I feel without our baby girl in our house or how hard it is to walk away from the hospital and leave her not knowing how she is doing. 

My heart is breaking.

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Ella is born!

Thursday, February 24, 2005
On Thursday night I was watching "The Apprentice" and I realized I had not felt Ella move yet that day. This is so unusual since she is quite a kicker. I called the doctor on call for my OB/GYN clinic and she said I needed to go to the hospital and get checked out. Matt was working a shift at LDS hospital so I drove to St. Marks and checked into labor and delivery. The nurses came and hooked up a monitor to my belly to monitor the baby's heartbeat and checked my blood pressure. The baby's heartbeat was a little high, but my blood pressure was sky high. They said they would wait 1/2 hour and check my blood pressure again. They did and it was still high. The doctor came in and said she would have to keep me there for the night to monitor my blood pressure every half hour. Matt arrived at this point and so we settled in for the night.

That night was horrid. Sleep was impossible since the blood pressure cuff was going off every 30 minutes. Also, a nurse came in and probed my tummy, causing me to throw up and I had a fever of 101 all night long.

Friday, February 25, 2005
The next morning (Friday) I had an ultrasound and then the Doctor came in and said I had preclampsia (or toxemia). A condition where the Mom's blood pressure raises suddenly and her body robs the baby of water to redirect it to her extremities (feet, hands and head). This caused a reduction of amniotic fluid around the baby. She then told us that we had to have the baby immediately and since I was not at all dilated they would induce labor with Cervidil at 4:00 that afternoon.

We were shocked. Matt's Mom jumped in her car and drove from Layton to Salt Lake City to help. Her and Matt rushed out and bought a playpen with a bassinet attached for Ella to sleep in and they tidied up our house for us coming home after the birth. They put the Cervidil in at 4:00 pm on Friday and told us we should just wait for 12 hours for it to do it's magic. They did warn us that at any time if the baby's heart rate climbed or my blood pressure went too high they would perform an emergency c-section.

Since I had toxemia there was a danger of swelling around my brain causing me to go into a seizure so they started an IV of Magnesium to stop that from happening. The magnesium causes a strange reaction in the body which causes you to feel all hot inside and very uncomfortable. Also, the magnesium IV can cause kidney damage if it sits in your bladder so they put in a catheter to constantly drain my bladder and started drawing my blood every 6 hours in order to check for elevated levels of the magnesium in my kidneys.

Saturday, February 26, 2005
The nurses woke me up this morning at 5:00 am and checked me. The monitors showed I had started to have mild labor pains during the night. I was dilated to a "1". I felt so defeated after that low number. They decided to start me on Patosin. I continued to have mild labor. They said I could have an epidural at any time, but the labor was so mild I didn't opt for one yet. They waited 6 hours more and rechecked and I was at a "2". Ugh! Another 4 hours passed and I was dilated to a "3".

I was beginning to think we would be going for a C section and then my water broke. Within 10 minutes I was begging for the Epidural. The labor came so fast and hard that when they checked my within 10 minutes of being a "3" I was dilated to a "4". I got the epidural (which worked for 20 minutes and then stopped working) and within an hour was at a "9". The epidural had worn off so the re-tapped it and it worked for another 20 minutes. During this time they tried to come and do the routine 6 hour blood draw and there was nowhere left on my hands or arms to draw from so they tried to take from my foot (ouch!) with no success.

The doctor (Dr. Horvath) came in and we started pushing. Matt was a great coach. Since I was only 35 weeks along, the ICU had sent a team into the delivery room. After 30 minutes the Doctor said she might need to use a vacuum. We said ok and within 2 more pushes she was out! She was born at 10:14 pm, weighed 6 lbs. 3 oz. And was 19" long. They quickly whisked her away and the ICU team worked on her. One of the ICU nurses announced that she had red hair. Soon they brought her over and let me hold her for about 5 minutes. She looked just like Matt to me. Then they took her away to the Nursery with Matt to give her her shots and have Matt help give her a bath.

The doctor finished up with me and then Matt and Ella came back around 1:00 am. I tried nursing her, but she kept falling asleep. The nurse and I tried everything to get her to stay awake and eat, but she wasn't having it. They took her to the nursery and I went to sleep.

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Braxton Hicks....OY!

Today I had some Braxton Hicks contractions. It was so unexpected. It made me start thinking of how soon little Ella is coming. I am excited because we are doing better at getting things ready and even picked out a little outfit for her to come home in.

My carpal tunnel syndrome is getting much worse. I have to wear my wrist braces all the time now. I am hoping it goes away after the birth since it's so hard to do everyday things with that pain.

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Baby Shower in Logan

Today was my second baby shower for little Ella. It was thrown in Logan by Nainy and cousin Heidi. Since the Chinese New Year is only a few days away we decided we should have that as a theme. We had rearranged the date once so that all of the family could attend and it was so great to have everyone there. Here's who came...

Top Row: Emmy, Nainy (my Mom) and Heather (cousin)
Middle Row: Auntie Mickey, Melanie (cousin), Korby (cousin) and her daughter Estee
Bottom Row: Heidi (cousin) and her son Holden, Holly (cousin) holding Olivia (Heidi's Daughter) and Emilie Dupuis (Mission Friend)

The first thing guests did when they arrived was remove their shoes and out on Chinese slippers we had bought for them. Nainy and I guessed the sizes so some were a bit painful to wear, but we made out okay.

Then we had everyone find out their Chinese Zodiac sign and we had them sit at the table next to signs they were compatible with. Then I told the legend of how the Chinese Zodiac came to be and we went around the table and read what personality traits went with each sign.

Then we had lunch and it was delicious. We ate Teriyaki Beef, Giosa, Egg Rolls, White Rice, Vegetable Fried Rice, Orange Chicken, Rice Crackers and mandarin Oranges. We had sparkling juices to drink which were each covered with a little Kimono bottle warmer. For dessert we had homemade creamy citrus sherbet with pocky sticks.

After lunch we played games. We played the red envelope game, which is a traditional Chinese New Year activity where red envelopes are hidden around the house with different denominations of money inside. Whoever finds the most money (not envelopes) wins. Korby found the most money and won the prize. Then all of the money was put into a piggy bank for little Ella.

Then we played games where we had to guess how many pink M&Ms were in a jar and how long a licorice rope (umbilical cord) was. I, as always, completely sucked at these games. I was actually 200 inches off on the umbilical cord length guess (I'm a math genius). Then we split into teams and everyone got a fortune cookie with a trivia question about childbirth inside and they had to answer without the help of the team. Some were really hard! After that we played Baby Shower Memory (which I was also horrible at!) The prizes were all Asian themed and it was really fun. I won a grow your own mini bonsai tree kit.

Afterwards I had each guest write advice on cards for little Ella's time capsule, which she will get to open on her 18th birthday. I have done this at the first shower and will do it at the shower in Layton as well so she has advice from all the important women who came to celebrate her life at her showers. We then opened the presents and they were so beautiful. The homemade ones were especially fun. I can't wait to set up the nursery and organize all of the little clothes and fun presents.

The shower favors were rice bags in fun Asian print flannel, a lucky Chinese coin, and Chinese character bookmark and the Chinese slippers.

We had such a WONDERFUL time at the shower. I was so grateful for all of the support and kindness of everyone who came and especially to Mom , Kezia and Heidi who pulled it all together for me.

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No Sleeeeeep.......zzzzzzz..zzz.

I have moved into a new and exciting phase of pregnancy where I can't get ANY sleep. Firstly because my belly has gotten so big that it's really hard to find a comfortable spot and once I do find one, the comfort lasts for all of 2 minutes until my hip starts to fall asleep and my back ache. I have tried all of the pillows in all different positions and that isn't working for me. Also my carpal tunnel syndrome, which has just started to be really bad in the last few weeks, wakes me up at night.

Secondly, Ella's kicking, although more dull than before, has become more jarring since there is less room for her to move around in there. It is nice to feel her moving and know she is alright in there though. I think she has flipped around since the kicking is all up in my rib area instead of in my lower abdomen like before.

Despite this lack of sleep, I have become an energized-organizing-fool! Every day I am making more and more progress with getting our house ready for little Ella. I have eliminated an entire bookshelf from our front room, moved the computer, reorganized the entire kitchen and started the set up the scrapbooking station. Also, I went through our papers and set up a workable filing system that should help us stay organized into the future.

Our bed is finally set up on it's frame in the bedroom, thanks to Matt, and today I tackle the organizing of our clothes in the bedroom closet and dressers and sew some favors for my baby shower in Logan this Saturday. I am really feel proud of all we have gotten accomplished and hopefully this can help us stay neat and tidy in the future when the baby comes and things are harder to keep neat.

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